Marriage: Am I Ready Enough?

Assalamualaikum.

Before I proceed, I hope that you will read it till the end since I don't want anyone to jump into the conclusion. 

Ok. Bismillah.

First of all, marriage or in other word, Baitul Muslim is not something that we can get into without any preparations in term of physically, mentally, emotionally and most important; spiritually.

It is a very big decision in our life when we take the first step into it because once we get married; of course, we want it to last until Jannah, right?

So, there are too many preparations to make since we might live together with our spouse longer than we live with our parents (If Allah grants us with long life) And please bear in mind (reminder to myself!) that marriage is not only about fun. It's about RESPONSIBILITY. You will have more commitments. You will deal with your husband, your children, your in-laws. Too many things to think. Too many people to handle. So, you cannot be selfish. You must prepare from now! But, it doesn't mean that you need to wait until you become perfect because life is a learning process. No one can be perfect, but you can make an effort into it and still improving yourself even when you have got married. 

I am now 19 and honestly, I don't have any "calon suami" (I'm not  promoting myself, please.)

In fact, it's still too young for me since I need to get ready in every aspect.

I admit that, of course, I have the intention to marry in early age. Perhaps in 2 or 3 years from now.  (Insha Allah Amiin) but still, Allah is the Best Planner. 

If 2 years ago, I was thinking that getting married is an easy task. I will have a husband by my side and I can share everything with him. The life will be so perfect. I'll have someone to complete me, yada yada yada.... and the imaginations of the sweet things about marriage goes on. But now, I start to think about the responsibilities (tarbiyyah has taught me a lot. Alhamdulillah) and I start to improve myself bit by bit. Insha Allah.   

To myself and people out there,

Marriage is not about you and your spouse only.

It's about building an Ummah. 

You are the reflection of your children.

You're the one who will shape your children. 

It's definitely not an easy task, especially when we live in this kind of world.

It's going to be a big challenge for us to raise our children.

So, get ready from now. Improve ourselves to be a good role model for our children.

After all, marriage is not about making children but to educate them to be a good khalifah and abid. 

May our children will be our asset in hereafter.  

May Allah guides us. Insha Allah. Amiin.

How Many Percent Do We Use Our Brain?

Assalamualaikum.

Brain is one of the blessings from Allah to us. Brain is the center in our body systems and what makes it more amazing is that for human, we have one thing called "AQAL". Aqal will distinguish between humans and animals, yet some humans do not use their aqal wisely. 

Last Thursday, I had usrah with my beloved murobbi and usrahmates. We were discussing on an issue that happens in Japan. And we moved on to our purpose of life. 

One thing that my murobbi said had opened my eyes. She said, "Why are we study? Do we study for ourselves only or for the ummah? If we study for ourselves, then we are only thinking about ourselves. So, we only use our brain for 1/7 000 000 which is approximate to 0.0000000143%  ." Woah! At that time I was like, "Oh, it is such a waste if we study only for ourselves. So, from now on we must set our mind that we study not for ourselves only, but for 7 000 000 billion ummah. And it is definitely not an easy task. It's a big responsibility." 

Okay, I tell you. If in our life, we only think about our problems only, then we are not more than a robotic human. We are very selfish thinking about ourselves. Everything we see is only for our advantages. That's why we often see our problem is like the biggest problem in the world ever. We have set a limit to our mind and we can't see the world in real perspectives. We'll be a narrow-minded person. Then, when we die, what are our contributions? We just live and die without purpose. Oh No! It could not happen to any muslim because a muslim should give benefits to others.

 "The best man is the man who gives the benefit of others." 

(Narrated by al-Bayhaqi)

Don't we remember that As-Syahid Imam Hasan Al-Banna once said,

So, where are we? Do we think of this ummah? 

How many percent do we use this blessing from Allah?

Imagine, the Prophet S.A.W, he uses his AQAL to contribute to this ummah.

The neurons in his brain must have connected to each other completely.

You see, until now, we get benefits from his contributions. Subhanallah!

LET'S RESET OUR MIND. 

Live for ummah for the sake of Allah and contribute as much as we can.

Use our brain to the maximum!

Forgive and Forget

Assalamualaikum.

When I was in high school, a teacher asked us in a class, "do you think you really forgive someone when you can't forget what he/she did to you?"

And, I started to think about it until now. 

Since this issue is related to our HEART, so it's quite hard for me to determine whether I have forgave someone or not. As a human, I surely have feelings and I get hurt. When I get hurt, of course it really takes time and space to heal it. My mouth uttered that I forgive, but my heart?

It's actually something wrong in our heart if we can't forgive the one who has wronged us. Because our beloved Prophet, Rasulullah S.A.W even forgave a person who once plan to kill him. Subhanallah. How forgiving he is. He even forgave the people of Taif who did not accept his dakwah and threw him with stones. And when the angel (Jibreel A.S) offered him to destroy the people, he refused. He even prayed for the people of Taif! Masha Allah! I just feel amazed with his pure heart. But, we?

Our God, Allah S.W.T also forgives His slaves, no matter how great our sins are as long as we make the taubah. 

  “Dan sesiapa yang melakukan kejahatan atau menganiaya dirinya sendiri (dengan melakukan maksiat) kemudian dia memohon ampun kepada Allah, nescaya dia akan mendapati Allah Maha Pengampun, lagi Maha Mengasihani."

[ 4:110 ]

“...Dan kalaulah mereka ketika menganiaya diri mereka sendiri datang kepadamu (wahai Muhammad) lalu memohon ampun kepada Allah dan Rasulullah juga memohon ampun untuk mereka, tentulah mereka mendapati Allah Maha Penerima taubat, lagi Maha Mengasihani”

[ 4:64]

See, The One who creates us, gives us everything we need in life and owns our life is ready to forgive us when we make taubah. 

source: google

How about us?

Why we need to keep grudge in our heart?

[I'm talking to myself actually]

Why we need to feel hurt everty time we recall what the person had done to us?

Why can't we just forgive and forget? 

Then, I got an answer.

It's because our heart still got diseases.

And, we need to clean our heart.

Remember. We also do mistakes to people and we also create scars in their heart.

So, why do we feel like we are "big" enough not to forgive a person who has wronged us?

Even Allah and the Prophet forgive people wholeheartedly. Why don't we?

Let's us keep trying to forgive and forget.

Like what Elsa said in "Frozen"

LET IT GO.

THE PAST IS IN THE PAST.. 

Bukankah kita taknak hidup dengan luka yang lepas?

Bukankah kita makin rasa sakit bila kita tak memaafkan dan melupakan rasa sakit tu?

Dan, bukankah orang yang menyakiti kita itu juga adalah saudara kita?

"Sesungguhnya, orang beriman itu bersaudara, maka damaikanlah di antara dua saudara kamu (yang bertelingkah) itu; dan bertaqwalah kepada Allah supaya kamu beroleh rahmat."

[ 49:10 ]