Depression

Someone asked me about people having depression.

First of all, what is depression? 

"A depressive disorder is not a passing blue mood but rather persistent feelings of sadness and worthlessness and a lack of desire to engage in formerly pleasurable activities." (reference) 

Depression is something that you should not joke around. Just like physical illness (flu, cough and fever), it needs to be treated. It couldn't be cured by just saying, 'everything gonna be alright'. Definitely no.

The level of depression varies between people. Depending on the severity of the factors, individual's reaction during hard times, support systems, etc.

And there is no pure black and white on how to treat it. And the treatment needs to be handled with care.

Some people blaming others for depression. Some blaming themselves for not being religious enough which make them feel depressed. Especially when we know, Allah tells us in Quran,

"Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah. Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured." (Ar-Ra'd: 28)

So some people feel like they're not pious enough, not religious enough, not good enough for feeling depressed. I tell her, blaming ourselves or others really don't make any difference. Yes, we must acknowledge that during the time of struggle, our imaan may be at its lowest. We feel helpless. We cry our heart out but no one is there. And shaytaan even tell us as if Allah doesn't care. Naudzubillah.

What should we do is during the time, seek help from others. If you need to seek a therapist, please seek. That doesn't mean that you are not being dependent on Allah. Instead, it is an effort, a manifestation, a proof that you wanted a cure. A proof to Allah that you are seeking His help through His servants.

Just like physical illness, when you are ill, you seek doctors. Does it mean you don't trust Allah? No. You trust Him, that's why you seek doctors. You trust Him, that's why you know that things can be worked out. Because you know, it is an effort to get cure from your illness. But still, we believe, it's Allah who cures us, not doctors. Doctors and medications are just an effort to get cured.

So, it is same to depression.

I know, it is easy for me to say, seek a therapist, take medication. But, really, it is you who can help yourself. I can just list out options. I can hear you. Give you support when you need it. But, it's you who are going through the time of depression. It's you who wants the best for yourself. If you can't find mercy of others on you, at least, help yourself by being merciful to yourself. I know it's definitely not easy. It is hard. I know it is hard, really. But, living in depression is seriously exhausting, so please, pray to Allah and help yourself.

And to people out there (an advice to myself especially), depression is not a joke. Depression is not something someone uses to seek for attention. Please, be merciful in your words. Please, be merciful in your actions. You never know others' struggle. If you can't help, at least, don't hurt.

Be kind to others just like you want Allah to be kind to you. If you have nothing good to say, be silent. Remember, 'qolu salama' (say words of peace). Be merciful to others. Who knows, by being merciful, people see the mercy of Allah, the Most Merciful. Who knows, by being merciful, people get closer to Allah. And who knows, by being merciful, Allah grants us Jannah.

p/s: my heart ache every time I see people make fun of people who is severely depressed. I always wonder, where is our sense of humanity nowadays? then, I realize, I need to start from myself. I'm writing this to create an awareness. Hopefully, after this, we can make a difference.

Can the believer suffers from depression?